Friends, First off, sorry to send this twice. I’ve been experiencing some technical difficulties. I noticed the white lettering that worked well on the site doesn’t work too well in the e-mail! Now rather than getting an e-mail without the text….here you are! I really didn’t want you to miss what Laura had to say. Today’s posting is a guest blog from Laura Crosby. Laura loves the Lord and loves people. She writes in a straight forward, honest way. She’s wife to John and mom to two young adult daughters. Be blessed!-Lori
There are two primary lies when it comes to parenting.
I’m sorry to burst your bubble, but both, as my daughter Maggie would say, are “lies from the pit of hell.”
If you’ve been a parent for more than like, 38 minutes you already know these are lies.
Or you’re on drugs or in denial.
We have two adult daughters (Katy, 26, and Maggie, 24) who we’re incredibly proud of. They are in great jobs, following Jesus, and they haven’t been arrested for a felony and haven’t been in drug rehab. Yet. It could still happen.
We’ve made mistakes. A lot of them.
Like the time we accidentally forgot one child at church. (We only HAVE two kids. You’d think it would be obvious if half our brood was missing in the car.)
Or the time John accidentally gave Maggie vomit inducing Ipecac in the middle of the night, thinking it was cough syrup.
Katy might point out how in grade school she was scarred for life when she was home sick and I let her watch “Wait Until Dark” while I ran to the grocery store.
Maggie, freezing and wet and traumatized, would remind you of the time John promised over and over that he would catch her sledding down the hill before she careened into the slushy pond. And didn’t.
These we can laugh at now (Except maybe Maggie on that last one), but there have been many other mistakes with more lasting consequences that have sent me to my knees.
You can add your own confessions. I know you can!
So the bad news is you’re gonna make mistakes and you’re not in control. But there’s good news too.
When the girls were in grade school once we were coming home from a vacation in Florida at a time we had had to pull them out of school.
They’re both really good students but keeping up with homework when there’s a beach beckoning is tough. In spite of our reminders, Katy had not done the work she was supposed to do. John, frustrated, said, “Katy! Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t punish you!”
She didn’t miss a beat. “Because you’re always telling us it’s all about Grace, Grace and more GRACE!!”
I think of all the ways I’ve messed up and, I think of my heavenly parent. I’m His reckless, well-meaning toddler, crashing into things and tripping over my toes. I’m overwhelmed by a God who picks me up and dusts me off, and sets me back on my feet with the power to redeem my mistakes, turn me around and point me in the right direction.
“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in your weakness.” 2 Cor. 12:9
2. There’s Someone better than you in control.
I think the go-to prayer for parents of kids at any age is basically “Helpmehelpmehelpme!” But it was during the college years when I felt particularly helpless and out-of-control as a parent that I developed this breath prayer:
Breathe in a name for God: “Abba Father”
Breathe out the cry of your heart: “Do what only You can do…”
“Protect, guide, encourage, convict, woo…”
It’s a practice that reminds me that God is sovereign and amazingly, loves my kids even more than I can.
What lies are you tempted to buy into as a parent? What practices are helpful for you?
Laura Crosby, is a follower of Jesus who says she gets it wrong a lot. She attempts to pay attention to the work of God in, through, and around her, but admits it’s definitely a sloooooow process! Laura loves creating all kinds of things, including a welcoming place in her home where there’s good food and lively conversation. She’s a friend to twenty-somethings journeying with Jesus, a walker, and a Starbuck’s groupie. Laura’s blog Awake My Soul Blog is about paying attention to the relationships, experiences, and practices God uses to form us…taking Him seriously, but ourselves not so much.
LOVE LOVE LOVE this! SO needed to read it today!
I agree! Laura nailed it. I think there is a third lie-our kids will turn out perfectly if we do it right. Yep-need Grace all around and definitely not in control!