Last Monday you read my review of Into the Woods.
Today we are gong to look at one of those pearls of wisdom found in the movie.
“I was raised to be charming, not sincere.”
(SPOILER ALERT– if you plan on seeing the movie you may want to wait to read the next portion)
Prince Charming justifies his infidelity to Cinderella.
Charming – the focus.
Do we raise our kids to be charming? Are we mainly worried about how they are perceived by others?
Do we expect polite behavior, good manners and forget about the heart behind them?
Sometimes we do. We focus on the behavior alone. We focus on the short-term goal.
When we look at the externals, we only deal with modifying behavior.
Parenting is more than behavior modification.
The long term parenting goal is character development.
Our kids behavior gives us a clue into what needs to be developed.
Does the child lie?
Short term: deal with the lie. Yes, use natural consequences to deal with the behavior.
But don’t stop there.
The long term goal of developing honesty is even more important. Model, talk about, and focus on developing honesty in your child.
We always know what we don’t want. Think in terms of what character traits are desired.
Otherwise we may have a Prince Charming on our hands!
Becky Danielson and I are so excited. Our books Raising Little Kids with BIG Love and Raising Big Kids with Supernatural Love have been published. And we want to spread the LOVE around! We are Sharing the LOVE with Give-Aways during the LOVE month (February). During February leave a comment on this post or any other Eternal Moments February post or any article over at www.1Corinthians13Parenting.com and be eligible for love gifts: books, jewelry, or a free parent coaching session. Winners will be drawn and notified by email each Friday in February.
© LoriWildenberg. All rights reserved.
About the Author
Lori Wildenberg is a licensed parent and family educator, parent coach, and co-founder of 1Corinthians13 Parenting.com. She has written 6 books including Messy Journey: How Grace and Truth Offer the Prodigal a Way Home; The Messy Life of Parenting: Powerful and Practical Ways to Strengthen Family Connections; and her most recent book, Messy Hope: Help Your Child Overcome Anxiety, Depression, or Suicidal Ideation. Contact Lori for your next event or for parent consulting or parent training courses. Lori can also be found mentoring over at the MOMS Together Group on Facebook.