Yesterday I witnessed a human tornado. Screaming, throwing paper, rifling contents into a box, and flying out the door. 

“Ah a  toddler tantrum,” you say?
An adult woman at Best Buy who wasn’t at her best. 
It took a moment for the dazed clerk to recover from the flurry of fury and serve his next customer. 

The feeling of being dissed by another draws out feelings ranging from hurt to irritation to anger.

We believe we should be, deserve to be, treated better.
I wonder, is this core belief is built into us?
Hang with me a moment while I unpack this thought.
Maybe it isn’t that we view ourselves more highly than we ought. Maybe it’s because we know we are created in God’s image.

Think of it, each one of us on this planet, believer and nonbeliever alike,  are created in his image.
It could be that is why we feel attacked or offended when we are taken advantage of, treated poorly, dismissed, or ignored. Perhaps in the depths of our being we have this expectation and desire to be treated with respect; not because of who we are but because of who our Creator is.
We naturally understand this in terms of ourselves but what about the other guy? Is he worthy of respect too?
As the our culture shifts and as the election draws closer, the examples of  sarcasm, name-calling, and sinful anger (really the list goes on) are everywhere. 
Disrespectfulness is swelling. It is digesting dissing steroids in super-sized doses. 
There is nothing worse than being disrespected by another adult. 
Oh wait yes there is…being dissed by your own offspring.
If you want your child to join the Culture Club of Disrespect, here are twenty-one ways you can do just that.
21 Ways to Raise a Disrespectful Kid
1.   Demonstrate you are above the law (taxes, rules of the road, etc.).
2.   Model disdain for authority figures (your boss, the police, your child’s teacher).
3.   Don’t honor your parents or your in-laws.
4.   Justify your child’s poor behavior. (“He’s a little grumpy today because he didn’t get much sleep.”) 
5.   Make excuses for your child’s lack of responsibility. ( “He’s too busy to _____.”)
6.   Apologize for living. (“I’m so sorry Logan, I should have thought to _______before you got home. I am so forgetful.”)
7.   Use personal attacks and call names rather than discuss the issue.
8.   Make your child the center of your universe.
9.   Give false praise or undeserved accolades.
10. Put pride over relationship. (“I’m always right. You’re wrong.”)
11. When angry, operate out of your heart instead of your head.
12. Treat folks in the service industry as second-class.
13. Talk about friends and family with contempt or condescension. 
14. Whine and complain about a task to be completed.
15. Forget to use manners at home.
16. Don’t ask to borrow, just take it. Don’t return the borrowed item. Don’t fix the thing you broke. 
17. Never say, “I’m sorry. I was wrong. Please forgive me.” 
18. Roll your eyes, express an exasperated huff, click your tongue, raise your lip, skew your brow, put your hands on your hips, point your finger, stomp off.
19. Don’t consider or listen to another’s opinion or thought if it is different from yours.
20. Use guilt or the silent treatment.
21. Treat your self better than everyone else. And expect everyone to treat you better, too.
Home is the place we are often the sloppiest with our actions and attitudes. 

If we want our kids to be people who honor and respect us, others, and most importantly God, we must first look at the messages we communicate at home. 

Personally, I need to remind myself, “All are created in God’s image. Am I respecting God’s image in this person? Am I treating him or her in a way I want to be treated? How am I doing being an image-bearer?”

If we can start with kindness, respect is sure to follow. 
Love is not rude.
1 Corinthians 13:5a

With faith, hope, and love,
Lori Wildenberg

If you are interested in more ways to train your child to be respectful, pick up either Raising Little Kids with Big Love or Raising Big Kids with Supernatural Love over at Amazon. 
Personally we relate. Professionally we support.

© LoriWildenberg. All rights reserved.

About the Author

Lori Wildenberg is a licensed parent and family educator, parent coach, and co-founder of 1Corinthians13 She has written 6 books including Messy Journey: How Grace and Truth Offer the Prodigal a Way Home; The Messy Life of Parenting: Powerful and Practical Ways to Strengthen Family Connections; and her most recent book, Messy Hope: Help Your Child Overcome Anxiety, Depression, or Suicidal Ideation. Contact Lori for your next event or for parent consulting or parent training courses. Lori can also be found mentoring over at the MOMS Together Group on Facebook.

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