I typically think I’m not so bad. I can usually come up with someone worse.

Thinking through situations where someone hasn’t dealt with something well, I may think I could have done better. Or when I have done it badly, I’m pretty good at forgiving myself, brushing it off,  and moving along.

This type of outlook can spill into family relationships and negatively affect them.
I think the litmus test of grace and forgiveness  is easily applied to driving. If I  happen to make a careless move I may say, “OOPSY.” And then proceed on without a worry.  But if a careless maneuver is made by another driver, I’m likely to say, “What the heck is wrong with him?” 
I am quick give myself grace when it comes to my own missteps or short falls. But what about gracing the the guy?
Here are a couple of  reflection questions I have been asking myself:
  • Am I as generous with administering grace to others as I am with myself? (Do the driving litmus test)
  • What does this sort of attitude and behavior model to others, including my kids?
I know what my attitude does not demonstrate. It does not reflect qualities that are God-honoring like:
  • Humility
  • Compassion
  • Responsibility
  • Grace
  • Forgiveness
  • Love
I think the cure for Scrooge like grace is to remember three things.
  1.  We are all created by God.
  2.  We are all created in his image.
  3. Jesus tells us to forgive as we have been forgiven.
When I recall these three things, my pride (the bottom line reason for my perspective) is replaced with those God honoring qualities.
I don’t want to be scroogey with grace and forgiveness. I want to be a person who readily gives grace, receives grace, gives forgiveness and receives forgiveness. If I really live and embrace these qualities I  will positively  impact my family and… my behind the wheel attitude will be adjusted. 

Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved,
clothe yourselves with 
compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. 
Colossians 3:12
Photo by Zach Meaney on Unsplash
© LoriWildenberg. All rights reserved.

About the Author

Lori Wildenberg is a licensed parent and family educator, parent coach, and co-founder of 1Corinthians13Parenting.com. She has written 5 books including Messy Journey: How Grace and Truth Offer the Prodigal a Way Home. and her most recent book The Messy Life of Parenting: Powerful and Practical Ways to Strengthen Family ConnectionsContact Lori for your next event or for parent consulting or parent training courses. Lori can also be found mentoring over at the MOMS Together Group on Facebook.

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